cremains | This pretty much sums it up

I'm a yeshiva student who lives in Jerusalem, in the middle of the city, which sadly is frequented by disco vans owned by Breslover Chassidim. For those of you fortunate enough not to know, they're crappy little vans with huge loudspeakers that drive around blasting disco hits, with the lyrics dubbed over to be about the Breslover rebbe.

I live above a small sewing shop.

My neighbour is HaDag ("The Fish"), an extremely thirsty young Chassid who plays tapes of Torah lectures when he wants to do drugs. A few nights ago the police were banging on his door, which is also our door.

I have four parrots. One is a spiteful, green, fatally incurious parakeet named Rashbi, nicknamed "the chamasnik." If you offer him water, even if he's very thirsty, he will throw it into your face, because it is more pleasant for him to ruin your day than to quench his thirst.

The second is HaGra ("The Gra"), a puppylike lorri who loves to roll over and be scratched on his stomach and who will follow you around as you walk. And the rest are two uninterested lovebirds, Tamar and Yehudah.

I am married to someone with whom I am deeply in love.

I have three stepchildren being raised Chareidi. They are wonderful, imaginative, hilarious kids, and the way they are being indoctrinated is frightening.